The Farcical Fidelity

Danish had never envisaged that his life would ever turn out this way. The evening, coastal, semi-dark skies stretched out beyond the limits with grotesque emptiness. The sun dissolving into the depths of the ocean was visible from his 12^th floor apartment, like all the symbols of felicity and happiness were being sucked into a deep void. A slight rim of golden sun was now evident like a last ray of hope and utopia… but alas, it went away too in a few seconds. Danish breathed a sigh… a sigh of a young man who had faced a lot. A sigh of a man who had achieved nothing but dejection. A sigh of a man who had lost the love of his life.

He got up from his balcony chair, after what seemed to be like a few days, and decided to take a stroll on the beach in an attempt to sink in his sad thoughts into the oceans too. A few minutes later, he found himself barefoot, walking on the wet sand alongside the beautiful and somewhat angry waters. The waves lashed on the bank, every time immersing his feet in cold water. He liked it; he wished that the waves would wash away his wounds too. But it seemed nothing could give him the satisfaction and content that he had always demanded from the cruel destiny. He was walking with his head down, hung low of lost pride, failures and struggles. Suddenly, to his own shock, he stopped dead in his track. He had almost bumped into a young lady who was sitting on the beach gazing at the horizon far away. It seemed as if she was trying to recollect something, or more so, was in the middle of a very important discussion with the depth of the ocean.

“Sorry…” This was all that, that came out from Danish’s throat. A meek, soft ‘sorry’ which maybe the girl did not even hear considering the enthrallment and engrossment she was showing towards the skyline. He started walking past her slightly shaking his head.

“That’s okay. Maybe God wanted you to bump into me…” He heard a very sweet, almost musical voice say behind him. He turned with such pace and excitement that he almost got a head rush. He now looked directly at the girl who had been staring at the ocean a few seconds before. She was alluring and stunning. It seemed as if angels from the heavens had descended on Earth. Her long flowing black hair flew softly because of the coastal winds, her eyes were deep and brown and caring, and her face was a perfect blend of emotions, beauty and attractiveness. She wore a bright red kurti and a pair of black denims, which were all wet and dirty as she had been sitting there for what seemed to be like hours.

For a few minutes, they just ogled into each other, as if diving into the depth of each other and allowing their emotions to do the talking. The girl suddenly got up, shaking all the sand off her and tying her hair into one cute and long pony.

“So? Lost in thoughts to the extent, that you did not even see a young, beautiful girl in your track?” She said with a naughty shine in her eyes. “What’s up dude?” She winked. By this time, he had almost toppled over with everything about this girl.

“N…Nothing… Actually, I am just sorry…” That was all he could manage stammering. She started walking slowly, which meant he was to join her. They started walking towards the exit from the beach.

“Oh… But if there is something that you want to share or say, then you can…” She said with a confidence and strength that he had rarely seen. “Because you know… it’s kind of scary for a boy to come on such a beautiful beach on a Saturday evening and not paying attention to a beautiful girl!” Having said that, she laughed on her own silly joke and as a manner of gratitude and respect, Danish gave a low giggle too.

After a few long, harsh and awkward seconds of silence, Danish spoke, “I had a break up. My girlfriend, whom I had loved for over eight years, now ditched me. She thinks I am a loser…” He paused as he thought he was about to break down again. He did not even know why he was saying all this stuff to an unknown stranger, let alone crying in front of her. But she had such a miraculous attraction and zealous attention and understanding that once he started, he just went on and on like he had never done before. He was himself amazed on the ease with which he was discussing his love story with her. He told her right from the beginning when he and his girlfriend had met, to how they fell in love. He told her about how her parents were against this and what a hard time he had convincing them that he was not such a useless person as they thought. He discussed all the ups and downs of his relationship finally coming to how his girlfriend started to develop a feeling that he was good for nothing and she could get a guy

It seemed as if he had let open a caged bird after years of captivation. He looked on his left at the girl, unknown and unseen, who had been listening all his stories with utmost calm and compassion. She looked back at him, in his eyes and had a soft, caring smile which said a lot than the words could at the moment. She finally got up and they exchanged contact numbers with the promise and anticipation of meeting again very soon and they were sure they would.

Danish went back home much more relieved than he had come. He could not still comprehend what had happened with him, and he spent all evening in reminiscing his meet with the unidentified stranger girl Sanvi. He was sure that they would meet again but he was clueless as to when. At night, he lay in his bed; his eyes wide open with not a single hint of weariness. He stared at the fan going around in slow dizzy circles just like his life. He had had a weird life so far. Not just that he had faced a break up at a young age but also he had not done too great with his career as an actor. But when he thought all over it, he just remembered all those motivating and encouraging things his new found friends Sanvi had said a few hours ago.

With such beautiful thoughts in his mind and a few made-up imaginary situations and stories about future, he did not realize when he went to sleep.

***

The phone did not ring; the bell did not go ‘buzzz’ in Danish’s apartment for the next two days. He went out on his daily routines to various auditions and trials here and there in the city, but everywhere he went and whatever he did, at the bottom of his mind somewhere he constantly thought of Sanvi. Her silky black hair, her young and juvenile eyes, her naughty yet uplifting smile and her caring words… they just did not leave him. As minutes passed by, he started to assume that she was not really interested in talking to him anymore.

It was almost the time he was about to give up, the time when he had just returned after a day’s slog, the phone rang.

“Hello…” He picked up and put all his effort in sounding casual and genuine. He knew boys did that all the time in front of girls.

“Hey… This is Sanvi…” Her voice sounded so different and angelic over the telephone.

“Ooh…” For once he did not know what to say, though it seemed as if he had been preparing since days. “I wasn’t really expecting your call…”

“Yeah… you bet!” Sanvi replied – genuinely or sarcastically, he could not figure out. “How have you been doing, by the way…?”

“I—I am—I am great…” He said almost stuttering out of nervousness.  “Can we meet again?”

I spoiled it! Thoughts started hopping in his mind. He had made a quick move in haste and anxiety.

“He he… Of course…” She giggled.

“Great!” He high fived himself and punched in mid air. “How about that new rock disc that opened up in…”

“Hey Danish…” She interrupted him right away. He was almost offended but Sanvi spoke again. “Can we please not go to a crowded and loud place like that? I mean… please… somewhere quiet and serene…”

Okay. Now what does she mean by that. Boys definitely did not take an offer like that from a girl very well.

“You want to go to a quiet place, ahan?”

“If you don’t mind…”

“Of course…” Danish replied. He was too happy to object anything. “Of course…”

They hung up after having decided to meet at another beach the next day, which was a little towards the outskirts of the city. Danish did not mind as Sanvi said that it was closer to her place. Before hanging up, he did manage to ask for her address, which she hesitantly gave.

That night was definitely not a peaceful one for Danish – a boy in love.

***

They met and they talked for hours.

The evening passed by in what seemed to be like a jiffy. Both of them were so engrossed in each other that they did not realize it was past 9’ o clock. They finally got up with their fingers dishevelled together. They looked into each others’ eyes for a few minutes as the moonlight shone on their bright faces. They came closer and wrapped each other into the tightest and most beautiful hug ever. It seemed that they had held the world into their hands for once and they were the only two people under the moon. But as every road has a bend, so did this moment.

Danish offered to drop Sanvi home to which she readily agreed considering the fact that her house was very close by. Both of them hopped on Danish’s motorcycle and sped off. As the strong gush of coastal air hit both of them in their faces, it felt amazing – enjoying this beautiful fresh air together for the first time. They were lost in their own thoughts and too engrossed to even say anything. It was Sanvi who broke the silence and spoke a little loud to make it audible to him on the bike.

“There is something you should know about me…”

Danish looked at her in the rear view mirror. Her eyes had a weird truthfulness and innocence to them and her hair blew wildly. She looked striking and it almost seemed perfect.

“Trust me Sanvi… there is nothing. I don’t want to know anything about you, your past, your regrets or anything… I just don’t care maybe.” Danish said that and he looked into the mirror again and saw her smiling very softly and contentedly.

They reached her building where she had an apartment on the 3^rd floor. They bid goodbye at the front gate of the building and went their ways.

As soon as Danish reached back his bike, he realized something and rushed back. Since the elevators were busy, he took the stairs and reached Apartment number 5, on the third floor in no time panting. He rang the bell expecting one of her parents to open the door. He was okay with it as Sanvi had told him that she never lied to them and they knew everything that was going on.

After, what seemed a long while, he heard some footsteps approach the door – a click, and the door opened. It was Sanvi’s mother.

“Umm… Hello Auntie…” Danish said. He was at the peak of his edginess and he did not even know why. He just smiled uselessly and tried to be extra gracious. “Actually, I just realized that Sanvi forgot her mobile with me, that she had asked me to keep in my jeans pocket while we were on the bike… So… just to… I mean… return this…”

Her mother nodded. He realized she had similar face cut and nose as Sanvi, but her eyes had a strange abyss in them.

“Come inside…” She said. It was a bit cold and emotionless; maybe he had bumped in at the wrong time. It was a peculiar environment inside her house. He looked around with his heart beating fast and loud enough to be heard a few meters away.

“Are you looking for her?” Sanvi’s mother asked him even more coldly, pointing at a picture kept on the side table. It was a picture of Sanvi with her mother, who was standing right beside him. But it was definitely some 5-6 years earlier as Sanvi looked younger and sweeter, though her smile was as beautiful and brightening.

   He almost beamed happily and said, “Wow… that’s cu--- I mean, umm… yeah, Auntie… Umm… I am looking for Sanvi…”

Her mother looked right at him and in the lowest of tones, said, “She died. 17 and a half months back…” She seemed to be looking right through him. “… In a road accident.”

***